HOW TO BE ALONE

by Tanya Davis



If you are at first lonely, be patient. If you've not been alone much, or if when you were, you weren't okay with it, then just wait. You'll find it's fine to be alone once you're embracing it.

We could start with the acceptable places, the bathroom, the coffee shop, the library. Where you can stall and read the paper, where you can get your caffeine fix and sit and stay there. Where you can browse the stacks and smell the books. You're not supposed to talk much anyway so it's safe there.

There's also the gym. If you're shy you could hang out with yourself in mirrors, you could put headphones in.

And there's public transportation, because we all gotta go places.

And there's prayer and meditation. No one will think less if you're hanging with your breath seeking peace and salvation.

Start simple. Things you may have previously based on your avoid being alone principles.

The lunch counter. Where you will be surrounded by chow-downers. Employees who only have an hour and their spouses work across town and so they -- like you -- will be alone.

Resist the urge to hang out with your cell phone.

When you are comfortable with eat lunch and run, take yourself out for dinner. A restaurant with linen and silverware. You're no less intriguing a person when you're eating solo dessert to cleaning the whipped cream from the dish with your finger. In fact some people at full tables will wish they were where you were.

Go to the movies. Where it is dark and soothing. Alone in your seat amidst a fleeting community.
And then, take yourself out dancing to a club where no one knows you. Stand on the outside of the floor till the lights convince you more and more and the music shows you. Dance like no one's watching...because, they're probably not. And, if they are, assume it is with best of human intentions. The way bodies move genuinely to beats is, after all, gorgeous and affecting. Dance until you're sweating, and beads of perspiration remind you of life's best things, down your back like a brook of blessings.

Go to the woods alone, and the trees and squirrels will watch for you.
Go to an unfamiliar city, roam the streets, there're always statues to talk to and benches made for sitting give strangers a shared existence if only for a minute and these moments can be so uplifting and the conversations you get in by sitting alone on benches might've never happened had you not been there by yourself

Society is afraid of alonedom, like lonely hearts are wasting away in basements, like people must have problems if, after a while, nobody is dating them. But lonely is a freedom that breaths easy and weightless and lonely is healing if you make it.

You could stand, swathed by groups and mobs or hold hands with your partner, look both further and farther for the endless quest for company. But no one's in your head and by the time you translate your thoughts, some essence of them may be lost or perhaps it is just kept.

Perhaps in the interest of loving oneself, perhaps all those sappy slogans from preschool over to high school's groaning were tokens for holding the lonely at bay. Cuz if you're happy in your head then solitude is blessed and alone is okay.

It's okay if no one believes like you. All experience is unique, no one has the same synapses, can't think like you, for this be relieved, keeps things interesting life's magic, things in reach.

And it doesn't mean you're not connected, that communitie's not present, just take the perspective you get from being one person in one head and feel the effects of it. Take silence and respect it. If you have an art that needs a practice, stop neglecting it. if your family doesn't get you, or religious sect is not meant for you, don't obsess about it.

You could be in an instant surrounded if you needed it
If your heart is bleeding make the best of it
There is heat in freezing, be a testament.

REMINDER

Every creature has a significant role in the grand plan. See the ants...they're doing their thing according to the will of the Creator. As long as you've chosen to do good, wherever you are and whatever life presents before you is God's will. Do what you have to do for His glory. Do your best. No ifs nor buts. I am beautifully crafted for a purpose.

WRONG WAY!

For the past months, I felt I was going the wrong way. I was like running in circles and not getting somewhere. Then, I took detours and ended up in crossroads. One after another. It was tough, nonetheless, I went on. Along the way, I met a number of disappointments and frustrations rained on me. Giving up could have been an easy choice to make. I almost did. But I pushed myself harder to face the challenges. As Paulo Coelho plurked, "Storms bring rain, rain fertilizes the soil." I grew. I learned lessons in life. I learned to slow down a little bit...To focus more on what's important...To let go of the emotional baggage that weighed me down...To ask for directions.

It is not yet the end of the journey. But I've got this good vibes that I'll be on the right track soon. Kitakits na lang sa finish line.

Yellow

Yellow is a happy color.

During the entire week, however, yellow invoked sadness and mourning among Filipinos. On the first day of August, former president Corazon Aquino passed away. On August 5, 2009, she was laid to rest in Manila Memorial Park beside Ninoy's grave . Thousands of Filipinos paid tribute on the streets.

Witnessing this historic moment, I was inspired more than saddened. I admire her because she lived a very meaningful life. In defending our democracy and serving our country well, she made a difference in every Filipino's heart. Now that she's gone and only her memories remain, she will always be remembered. She left a significant mark not only in this country but in the entire world.

Now, it's our turn. What can we do for our country?

reSET on 07-08-09

7, 8, 9...

reset.refresh.restart.

letting go of unfulfilled dreams.
forgetting painful memories.
learning from mistakes.

starting all over again.

I am.

smile.
be healthy.
enjoy life, love more.
become a better person.

I will.

reset.refresh.restart.